Put a Ring On It (In the Post, That is)

Our rings arrived today!!! I might be wearing mine as I type; Alex might be wearing hers while she cooks. We're never going to tell, but I can tell you that they don't feel like ours. Not yet, anyway.

AND, can you guess what song came on the radio (yes, I'm totally serious) when we went to open the USPS box full of silver and gold love: 'Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)'. Yep, seriously awesome.

So in honor of our rings arriving, the wedding just over a month away and the giddy-gay vibe in our flat right now, I give you Glee's version of Beyonce's 'Single Ladies:'

We might just have to play this song at the wedding.

Our Rings....

I just couldn't wait. This morning I got an email from Jesse Danger, the eco-metalsmith making our wedding bands, with a teaser photo. I've just melted all over my chair at work:


My head keeps falling to the side, too, as I sigh looking at them. You know that scene in Legally Blonde where Selma Blair's character and her bitchy friend are at the Halloween party and her friend reassures her that everything will be OK because she has the Harry Winston diamond her finger? Well, in case you don't, Blair holds out her hand for them both to admire the ring, and then they sigh in unison and their heads fall to one side. That's how I feel. Gorgeous perfection.

UK Wedding Update!

Whew--the wedding planning is on a serious roll. A check list for as much your enjoyment as to save my sanity!

Wedding Dress: As you know, bought my dress in September in Portland and brought it back with me to London; loved Luella's Boudoir too much not to take it there for alterations and ended up meeting the lovely Kat who altered the straps and hemmed it. Let me tell ya: I loved it when I bought; when I tried it on after all the alterations were complete, I've never felt more beautiful.

Wedding Suit: After months of talking about Gresham Blake's women's suits, Alex, her mum and I went down to Brighton weekend before last to have Alex try on a few (and for me to get some much desired frozen yogurt). I did see her in variations of a 3 piece suit, but not sized to her and in a different color--so technically not seeing her before the big day, right? She settled on a 3 piece suit in an oatmeal wool with lilac lining to be ordered asap! Eek! She's gonna look gorgeous...

Wedding Shoes: My shoes for the UK wedding are sorted (purple and lovely) while Alex is still deciding to wear red or not wear red. I think it'll help once she's got her suit to try them on with.

Hair: While some of you may not have seen the veil experience, I have decided no veil. Instead, I've ordered and received a gorgeous purple flower for my hair. Plus, had the hair trial with Tiko Lilly in Fowey over Christmas and booked in for the day of the wedding--yay!

Ceremony Venue: Well, you've heard the Marina Hotel had sold. It's definitely officially, definitely a construction site in April, and we've definitely moved to The Fowey Hotel. And actually, my Aunt R was right: it is a blessing in disguise--bigger room, same cost, extras like flowers and chair covers, wider views, and kick-ass honeymoon suit. Check out So You're Engayged for the updates on what happened 'When Your Wedding Venue Gets Sold: Parts 1-3.' All in all: Yeah Fowey Hotel! Bring on the cava and strawberries and make way for the magnificient Clare Murphy to weave her storytelling magic...

Reception Venue: Gallant's Sailing Club it is. Andrea is on it for how to decorate it and somehow we're gonna squeeze around 80 people in. It'll work. I'm just looking forward to the good food, DJ Guy, and the dance floor that opens up onto the balcony. Cross your fingers for warm weather!

Photographer: Over Christmas, we met with John from Cornish Wedding Photography and got along swimmingly. He's down to earth, shoots gorgeous lanscapes, and is totally up for being our wedding photographer! Plus, he really liked 2 of the places in Alex's house--the landing on the stairs and the garden stairs--that we want photos taken. Good times.

DJ: Speaking DJ Guy (not sure if that's his actual DJ name, it's just what I'm gonna call him here) is a friend of Alex and her brother's from way back. We went to the club he DJ'd in Bristol for New Years and his collection of vinyls and iPod were funky and classic. He's up for requests and Alex's sister wants to bring along a few of her vinyls to share in the mix. Dancing. Can you tell we like dancing? Also, Alex's sister-in-law, Erica (not from America), has agreed to sing at the reception (Yay!). We've still to figure out what, but we're getting there. There is talk of 'The Rose'... (Mom & Kay, I'm looking at you...)

Food: After the ceremony, The Fowey Hotel is providing cava & strawberries as well as cream tea (scones, Cornish clotted cream, and jam + sandwiches) later on in the afternoon during storytelling. Yum. For dinner, we're in the process of ordering a selection of meats, cheeses, stuffed peppers, quiches, salads, breads, mini Cornish Pasties (pronounced p-aaa-sties, like past) from family friends Sue and Becky from Bellamama Deli in Lostwithiel. Double Yum.

Cake: The cake order is also in the process from Alex's aunt: 2 layers of Traditional English wedding cake, white marzipan, purple & green ribbons, fresh tulips, and letterpress cake topper in A & E. Woot!

Rings: Just ordered our wedding rings today. They are gorgeous, diamond-free, recycled metals, Etsy found. Check them out. Of course, we couldn't resist a few extra goodies from the same designer, Jesse Danger.

Invitations: All I can say on the invitations is I'm glad we didn't order them BEFORE we found out the Marina Villa had sold; luckily, it was the same day. We have also officially ordered them today though and Baumbirdy on Etsy is rocking the quick order. Those of you expecting UK invites, they'll be to you in early March.

*Breath* Holy moly, that's a lot of stuff we've done! Things still need to be confirmed, smaller fiddly-bits (like jewellry, table decorations, hen night, etc) are still needing to be planned, but really, we are doing damn good. On the day we went to try on suits for Alex, it was 3 months until the wedding. There are moments when that timeline causes a bit of a panic; other times, I can hardly wait.

Not Entering Panic Mode

If you could see the state of our house right now, you'd either think two things: 1) Look at those piles! They must be planning a wedding! or 2) How could they possibly have time to plan a wedding!? Well, both are true. To say that April has been far from our minds would be a lie, but the amount of time we get to spend thinking about it sure is limited. That said, here's the latest:

On Saturday, my friend Julie and I went to my dress fitting at Luella's Boudoir in Wimbledon Village. It was definitely an experience to be pampered and doted upon by the women who work there (who were lovely, and who loved my dress--double yay). They even got me to try on a veil, the reaction of which was not expected. If you're interested in the variations of said veil, click here (Alex has promised not to look as you can also see my dress). While it was fun to play dress-up-bride for part of it, it was also a bit shocking and, to be honest, not really 'me.' Definitely leaning more towards something like a purple fascinator or flower for me hair I think! (Maybe something like this or this.)

On the photographer front, Alex and I both got to talk on the phone to a Cornish photographer we found online: John Walmsley of Cornish Wedding Photography. After searching and looking through loads of portfolios from photographers in Cornwall, Devon and the London area, we really wanted to stay local--and we liked John's photojournalistic style best. We're set to meet him at his over the Christmas break to chat a bit and make any final decisions (i.e. whether to book him or not!). I'm really looking forward to meeting him in person, and hopefully being able to check off 'photographer' off our list with ease and confidence!

Speaking of ease and confidence, we've also found out this week that our wedding ceremony venue, the Marina Villa Hotel, has had an offer made on it to buy it and turn it into a B&B. (Alex apparently knew it was up for sale; I did not.) It would probably be fine if they were leaving it as is, but it sounds like if the deal goes through, the hotel will be under B&B-rennovations in April. Construction=no wedding venue. Not all hope is lost (although Alex was quite peeved for a bit) as nothing is final yet, and there are still other options for us to get married on the river in Fowey (just not as perfect...)

Not to end on a bummer note, have I mentioned recently how much I love Etsy? Seriously, they should pay me for all the advertising I do (hint hint). This week's Etsy wonderfulness:

• My earrings (for california--and maine) arrived in the mail and I absolutely adore them!
  
• Alex's wedding present is officially ordered.
  
• AND...our wedding ring designer 'would be truly thrilled to create a set of bands for you for such a great occasion.' Jesse Danger = rockin'. He even quotes Frank Lloyd Wright on his profile...

130 days til we're hitched! (Oh wow, now that's a reality check for ya.)

Love & Gratitude

Hello folks--we're back! After a week of Thanksgiving madness and joy, Alex and I are resuming our normal, already-hectic lives. And yet while much food and sugar were consumed in the last week, we've also been up to quite a lot of wedding-y things!

First of all, for anyone who is considering email Save the Dates, let me tell you--it's the coolest thing ever! Aside from the dozen or so emails that will bounce back, the immediate connection with friends and family--near and far--about your big day is such a thrill! Alex and I kept checking our email and watching the counter on our website (mywedding.com) to see the amount of visits rise! The boost in wedding buzz did us girls some good.

As I am spending many hours in front of my computer these days (yes, more than usual--and that's saying something) my mind has gone off and wandered over to many places, the old and new favorites being Etsy and Rock n' Roll Bride. All was not in vain, however, as I am finalizing the details on Alex's wedding gift (no, I'm not telling), we may have officially, finally found our wedding rings (more in a minute!), and I now truly know the meaning of the blogger term 'wedding porn' (thank you, Off-Beat Bride for that, too!).

Rings? Sorry, did I say something about rings? OH, I did. And no, we've decided not to have diamonds (champagne, recycled, conflict-free, eco-friendly, or otherwise). Check out "Love is on the inside:"


So, where did I find it? Etsy, of course. And this lovely ring is made by the guy with the coolest name: Jesse Danger. (And if you click over to his shop, yes, we are getting the dragonfly wing necklace and ring, too.) This is the description of this sterling silver and rose gold ring goes like this:

"The silver on the outside has a clean and modern look that will take on its own unique finish as it wears over time, while the inside remains true to the day it was first made..."

*Melt.* Gorgeous. Meaningful. Our two favorite metals. One ring to symbolize our continuous committment to each other. No diamonds that are 'forever,' but not really us. (We can save those for birthdays, maybe anniversaries, we think.) Nothing crazy out of our budget. Oh yeah, and did I mention all the materials are recycled? Yes, we are just a little bit in love.

The other fabulous news is that we may have found our UK photographer! More updates on that soon, but we spoke with John from Cornish Wedding Photography on Sunday night and we think it's going to be a fit!

The Ring?

Discussions of how many rings, how to source them and their meaning aside for another post, check out this beauty. We think we've found our ring design.

Brighton Finds

A weekend in Brighton with the lovely and newly civil-partnered J & E (Alex's sis and now sis-in-law!) proved wonderfully delightful for wedding ideas.

First, Greshman Blake, bespoke tailors. J got her wedding outfit from there and Alex is definitely pining for the same. We've been to their shop in Brighton a few times now, but after purusing their site just now, found out they have a by-appointment-only, London shop too!

Let's hope, though, Alex doesn't want the shotgun to go with her wedding outfit, too.

Next, the Lanes in Brighton are full of jewellry shops and on a last-ditch whim on Sunday, Alex, Christy and I found ourselves staring into the windows on an antique jewellers--and found a design we really, really like. Both of us. BOTH of us. It's exciting.

Of course, it being a second-hand ring, there was only one. Hence, it's just an idea, but a really good one. And one that we can take to preferably eco-friendly, conflict-free designers (Brilliant Earth, Green Karat, Leber Jeweler, Dawes Designs or the like*...) and use it as a possible starting point for a custom design.

And last, but not least, J&E passed on A Very Pink Wedding: A Gay Guide to Planning Your Perfect Day. I'm not sure they actually read the whole thing, and it may possibly be stressing me out a bit, but hey, it's nice to have a book for your kind of wedding.

Now I'm crossing my fingers Fowey will be as fruitful, but with wedding venues and dates this coming week!

*Hat tip to Robyn. It's no coincidence that she's born on Earth Day.

Champagne Diamonds

Not gonna lie, I have started to become distracted lately by shiny things. Sparkly, diamond shaped shiny rings to be exact. Don't get me wrong: I love our engagement rings. But, we agreed simple on the engagement rings and fancy on the wedding rings and like any bride-in-waiting, my left finger's starting to twitch.

It seriously didn't occur to me until recently to start looking for what I actually might want in a wedding ring, especially one with any rocks involved. That changed on Sunday when we were in Old Spitalfields Market in East London and happened by a jewellery stall with a sparkling, square cut "champagne" trio of cubic zirconium set in silver that just happened to fit me by Amanda Mansell. The style was all wrong on me, but the color. The color stuck with me.

Then I was in Liberty today with Christy and figured, what the hey, I might as well try on some of these fancy rings they've got here. I am ENGAGED after all--when do I have a better excuse?

So I did, and it was gorgeous. And guess what? The first ring to catch my eye: a ring of champagne diamonds. Sadly, I can't find pictures online of either ring, but I figured this would suffice to get the point across.


I think Alex and I should try us on some rings. Mission: find a recycled champagne diamond, a designer, a setting, and ring to "match" for Alex--all on a budget. Go.

The Proposal Story #2

On Saturday July 11th, Alex, her parents, her brother (T), her sister (J) & her financee (Erica not from America), and I are in Brighton for J & E's civil partnership the following day, taking a walk along the seaside for the afternoon. It may be July, but it's windy and cold and my hands start to hurt about halfway down the beach. Naturally, I go to stick my hands in Alex's pockets to warm them up.

'Not in there!' Alex snaps, batting my hand away.

I felt something in her pocket and must look startled as Alex apologizes, but without explanation. We continue walking on, but now my mind is racing: 'Is that a ring in her pocket? No, it's a funny shape for a ring box. I don't even know if she's gotten a ring! It's her sister's wedding weekend. I thought I was going to have to wait until August, after exams and papers and everything. Could she really be proposing today--where?!!?'

As a family, we walk on to the Fishing Museum. I have absolutely no interest of going inside at this point.

'You're too clever,' Alex says, a bit deflated.

'I don't know what you're talking about,' I reply.

She smiles.

'Should we go for a walk?' I ask.

Brighton beach is rocky and I take off my flip-flops to manage over the rocks; Alex is quiet for a minute and then says, 'I've always wanted to propose on the beach.' We stop near the edge of the surf.

Alex turns to me, takes my hands. She looks gorgeous: her hair wind blown, black shirt, white jacket; I can't believe she's my girl, my financee.

She says, 'Erica, I love you. I want to go on this big adventure with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Every day I am in awe of you: your strength, your beauty, your passion.'

The tears start rolling. I try not to lose focus.

Alex takes the little cardboard ring box from her jacket pocket.

'Should I get down on one knee?' she asks.

'You don't have to,' I reply.

'I want to,' she says and kneels before me. 'Erica, will you marry me?'

'Yes. I will.'

Tears are streaming, I can barely speak. She places the ring on my finger. I kiss her and we hear applause from up the beach--a group of people our age are cheering for us!

We giggle and go all mushy and then make our way back to the Fishing Museum where her family is waiting for us:

'Wanna see my ring?!'

From Cry of the Gulls, in Fowey, Cornwall. Picked out in April 2009.

Silver and rose gold ring by Les Grimshaw.

Too excited to take pictures,
we only have this one of both of us!

Celebratory sweets from Sweet Boutique, strawberry flavored, of course!
(And some pineapple for good measure...)

Finding the Perfect Ring

Not gonna lie, I started to look for a ring for Alex in July 2008. While I knew she was the one for me ever so early, it was after a three-week stay with me in Los Angeles (where I was living at the time) that prompted my search: I just wasn't gonna let this girl go. There also might have been some time to kill in between restuarant work and the endless summer hours in my aluminum trailer...

Wanting to head down an eco-conscious route from the start, I began looking into recycled materials and conflict-free diamonds. One of my ladies from university, Knits with Carrots, is my go-to girl for anything ethical and so when I asked her about where I might start to look, she pointed me to Brilliant Earth, Dawes Designs, Green Karat, and Etsy.

Realizing after I'd been dazzled by diamonds that Alex probably didn't want any bling, I thought I'd combine money with politics instead and looked up Love and Pride, an online jewelry and accessory store where 10% of the profits are donated to LGBT orgs like Lambda Legal and the Matthew Shepard Foundation.

Of course, I found one I liked for me:

18k White Gold 3 Stone Spiral Ring, Love and Pride

The search still continued, but it brought me back to Etsy, my favorite place for all things handmade. I figured what could it hurt to type in "tree bark wedding ring" just to see what came up, right?

Why "tree bark wedding ring," you might ask? Well, I'd already decided where I was going to propose too, beneath this:

St. Catherine's Castle, 14 February 2008

Lo and behold, Etsy delivered and I had the absolute pleasure of finding Beth Cyr's jewelry, the Athens, Georgia, creator of--wait for it--the tree bark wedding ring. Not only that, but Beth's first wedding set was for two lovely ladies in Georgia and she was a such joy to get to know over the course of designing Alex's engagement ring.

The end result was perfect.

A&E

Tied with a ribbon, 11 April 2009